Sunday, November 27, 2011

Day 27 - Gone Purple

Word Count - 56210

And so, for me at least, another NaNo has gone into the record books. Purple bar ahieved, winners badge obtained, certificate filled out. 

The purple is always met with mixed feelings, at least for me. Happiness and wonder at my achievement of course, but also the sadness that another NaNo is coming to a close. This year is particularly sad because - unlike other years, I have fully experienced the joy of social NaNo. No, I might not have made it to write -in's or kick off parties. There are no end of NaNo celebrations in the future - though I did get to finally toss away my crutches last week - this stupid knee brace is history pretty soon too, no matter what my Dr says! What does he know anyway?  

I have to admit to a overwhelming feeling of melancholy as I sit now to write my final Nuttiness that is NaNo blog - I will be officially be putting this on hiatus as of today. I have already started a new one called CJLand that I will post to over the coming year. I hope that you will follow me over there and join for updates, even though they may not be regular. I will be posting snippets of writing and maybe a little poetry when the mood strikes.

Another year, come and gone. So fast! Thirty Days and Nights of Literary Abandon. What an appropriate title - November seems to be abandoning me so quickly! It will all be over soon, even though technically my challenge ended on November 13th, the spirit has lingered. Soon, participation in the forums will fall off. My beloved Guilty Secrets thread will go silent, and who knows what will become of the NaNo circle on Google+ that I have come to love so much.

I dread it all, the loss, the uncertainty, and most off all I dread the 366 days between now and November 1st 2012.  Yes, that's right - 366. 2012 is a leap year. Damn it all to hell!

Over time I will forget, by February it will be a vague memory. Somewhere around the beginning of August I will remember that November isn't that far off and it is time to start planning. I will think - 'I really should prepare better this year' I will realize that I will do better if I have a defined plot and characters in mind. Then I will forget all about it until October. Then the hustle will begin, characters will take form, a plot will be born, scenes, places, scenarios - all will come to life as the trees go from green to red, yellow and orange.I will determine to go slow, to take my time and enjoy the ride.  If past NaNo's are any indication, all my determination and plotting will be ignored once I start pounding on the keys at midnight November 1st.

I am a pantser who has the need for speed. It is who I am, and at my age, I don't see that changing anytime soon. Meh - I am what I am, I guess I can live with that.

I've had to overcome a lot to succeed this year. Not a bit of it was easy - not one single word. I ended up with a piece of crap that has already been salvaged, scrapped and dumped. About 35k sits now in the bottom of my recycling bin. But that's the thing about NaNo, you don't have to be perfect, it is the ideal challenge for me, because I so seldom am.

Like I said at the start of the month - it's all about the ride. Feeling the wind in your hair as you zoom past the milestones. 1k - 5k - 10k 20-30-40-50k and beyond. Blue to Green to Purple. Well, normal years - we didn't get green this year. Not everyone made 50k, and that's okay too. The point is having tried at all. For those who read this who didn't make it - I hope from the bottom of my heart that you will try again next year.  I didn't win my first year, but man it lit a fire in me that carries over to this day.

 And so, as I look back on another November, I'm thinking again about the ghosts of NaNo past and how they have a new friend. I realize that they aren't the only ones. Because it isn't the writers block, the horrible sex scene I struggled through, or even the lovely chocolate I will remember about NaNoWriMo 2011.

It will be you.

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